BUT TOURIST BOARD IS FULL OF SHYTE
“Help!” a friend texted me from the Mercury Beach bash, just a few weeks ago. “I’m being raped alive. Tooo MUCH ASSSssss!!!!!!!”
Deep in the ass-infested foam and fun, he was being swept away by the whirlwind that most people now recognize as the rebirth of Aqua Action. He couldn’t see what those of us who were not buried in foam and splashed in brine could see.
For merchants, restaurants, guest houses and small entrepreneurs, the Mercury Beach bash was better than Christmas. Money rained down on them for the entire weekend, non-stop, in bucket loads.
Standing tall over the success, two of St Lucia’s most iconic leaders, Shazi Chalon and Cuthbert Didier.
Both are unconventional. They can make any suit more swag than the next guy, but they are not suit and tie guys. They just make sure they get results. It’s probably the only reason that nobody has shut them down or shut them out yet. They must have agreed.
Better than Christmas.
That was the most accurate description. But there was a more biting description.
The Mercury Beach Bash was better than Jazz.
It spent less money, made more money and thanks to Louis Lewis and company, it had nothing at all to do with the financial black hole called the St Lucia Tourist Board.
Chalon and Didier tried to get the Tourist Board involved. They didn’t really want anything from them but their endorsement.
But Tourist Board disavowed anything to do with the Mercury Beach bash. In fact, they frustrated the process of getting it onstream. They had reservations, they said. After all, boat traffic between Luci and Laba is deeply associated with the drug trade. They didn’t want their name involved in anything that might have anything to do with bringing drugs into the island.
RDM means ri de mort, which translates basically into LOL. But I think this is more like a WDM, which doesn’t translate into anything but What de Cordormont!!! (sic). Forgive the misspelling. I’m slightly dyslexic.
Because everyone in Luci knows that drugs don’t come from Laba to Luci. The drug trade doesn’t work that way. It works the other way around. Laba gets drugs from Lucia.
So if the French want to hold a beach bash, believe you me, they ain’t bringing no drugs. We’re the ones who bring the drugs.
Having suffered a huge embarrassment as a result of dissing the Mercury Beach promoters from Martinique, they now have to put on a brave face and pretend like they are doing something good.
So what did they do?
The same thing they do every time, Pinky.
They spent endless money on a trade show.
And they’re so dumb, they posted pics of it on facebook, so people can see them with their fake smiles, standing in front of thousands of dollars in tax payers money that will shortly be reduced to garbage.
And what shall we get for this expenditure?
The same thing we get every time.
No result at all.
Jut Louis Lewis and Tracy Arnold talking about how tourism marketing doesn’t work like that.
Are you still buying it? Are you buying that Tourist Board is worth the tens of millions we spend on them every year?
For more on Tourist Board’s blague, click these links. Some of them are really funny