TNT: QUESTAYING ESTAY & FLETCHER’S BELELESH

QUESTAYING ESTAY

HERE’S THE DEAL: I FIND IT STRANGE THAT WITH SO MANY UNSOLVED MURDERS, A STRUGGLING ECONOMY AND GANJA LEGALIZATION SWEEPPING THE SENSIBLE WORLD, ST LUCIAN POLICE ARE STILL MAKING TIME TO ATTACK AND DESTROY GANJA PLANTATIONS. SO DIS FLOGG DECIDED TO ASK DENNERY SOUTH MP, EDMUND ESTEPHANE HOW HE FEELS ABOUT IT. AFTER ALL, DENNERY TRAFFICS MORE GANJA THAT CASTRIES, ITSELF. HIS ANSWERS WERE SO DELIGHTFUL, I FIND NO REASON TO EDIT THEM OR ADD TOO MUCH COMMENTARY. OTHER REPORTERS JOINED IN THE FUN, QUESTAYING ESTAY ON OTHER ISSUES.

Marijuana is illegal and I, I, I think think everybody should obey the law. The government should provide more jobs and economic opportunities for the people so they don’t, don’t don’t….It’s illegal and, and…IT’S ILLEGAL….

There is a turnaround on the world economy and we (in the last Flambeau government) were doing what we can to keep our economy afloat.

That is why we engaged in all of the things that we did. To make sure everybody would keep surviving.

That is what my political leader is saying. You have a situation where the economy is not doing well and then all the government does is borrow. Ok. When you borrow to pay your base activities, then you are putting your country further behind.

(What alternative strategies does UWP have a local Lois Lane asked)

My party is putting a comprehensive strategy together. One of the things we doing, we started to do was put that direct foreign direct investment together. We have to look for foreign direct investment so that we can get the multipler effect and so on and economical growth. We need to grow the economy.

(Another reporter wanted to know his opinion on Claudius Preville’s challenge of Allen Chastanet’s UWP leadership.)

I’m not too sure what Mr Preville is trying to achieve. But I will say today, in my opinion, the party is trying to stabilize itself and so on and we should do away with such a move.
I’m sure we’re going to sit down and look for all the pros and cons.

Mr Castanet is blamed as a scapegoat in the party. As far as I see he has done everything to glorify the party and bring everybody together and to restructure the party and you know this is just what Mr Chastanet has done.

That’s my opinion. But I’m still saying we’ll sit down and look at the issues and deal with them one by one. I’m sure we’ll have somewhere within the administration of the party for Mr Preville.

Like I said, that might just be my good advice. But I still think we should sit down and think about it. There has been some talk that has gone around but…maybe not the way that I’ve heard that it would have happened.

MUSA ON GANJA TOURISM

JUST TO BE FAIR, WE NOW PRESENT AGRICULTURE MINISTER MUSA JNBAPTISTE’S UNEDITED QUOTES ON GANJA LEGALIZATION/ BASICALLY, IN SPITE OF BEING TEN MILLION ZILLION TIMES BRIGHTER THAN ESTAY, MUSA HAS THE EXACT SAME IDIOT OPINION.

I’m not sure I have studied this matter sufficiently to say anything about it. The issue of marijuana is something that should be dealt with at the level of CARICOM.
Oh, you mean, like regional unity, free movement, free labour and other things that CARICOM has been talking about for more than 100 years but still haven’t really happened? Like that Musa?

Because anything that happens at the level of a single country will impact what happens with travel and so on…

Oh you mean how Jamaica is legalizing the high grade while the rest of y’all motherfuckers sleeping?

And there are a lot of legal issues that should be dealt with at the level of CARICOM.

So generally, that’s the view of the government. And we are pushing this thing at the level of the region.

(How do you feel about the fact that an economic crop is being stifled in a recession while there are bigger criminal priorities?)

I’m not sure there are bigger or smaller criminal priorities. At this stage, it is illegal to grow or use marijuana. Whatever personal view you have about it, based on the laws of the country…we know there is a process at the level of CARICOM to deal with that matter. And I’m satisfied that the leaders of CARICOM are dealing with it collectively. At this stage it is illegal. So my position is that when something is against the law in St lucia, that we obey the law! And that is what…until that changes…so for now I, I, I, I would would advise everyone to continue to obey the laws of the country.

HAVE YOU EVER SMOKED MARIJUANA, DIS FLOGG ASKED BOLDLY

No, I have never smoked marijuana.

CHICKEN!!!

(Another reporter asked him about chicken production. The genius fell right into the trap.)

Well, in the previous Labour Party government, we, we started a process to ensure that our local farmers produce more chicken and in this Labour Party government, we continue to do, to do so.

I think it is an opportunity for many farmers. It’s a six to eight week commodity. And we continue to do all we can to encourage our farmers. Despite all of what you hear people say, we continue to push that our local chicken is better.

(To which we reply that everything you said about chicken is true about ganja, except that ganja farmers have a guaranteed export market that pays foreign currency and local chicken does not.)

BELELESH:

JIMMY FLETCHER SHOWS OFF HIS WATCH TO STUDENTS WHO CAN’T AFFORD BOOKS

JIMMY FLETCHER AND THE FUTURE

“Nyah, nyah, nyahnyah, nyah!”

That’s basically what Jimmy Fletcher said in his speech to secondary school students last week. Most of them are poor and cannot afford to live in the future like him and the rest of his friends in Lab-Flam.

You see, Jimmy Fletcher has the future all figured out.

Last week at the 18th Junior Achievement Awards, he proved it to secondary school students. At least, his words did.

“We are training people for jobs that didn’t exist just a few years ago,” he said, showing a lits of about a dozen high demand jobs that only existed after the internet was created.
Students were astonished. They didn’t get training for jobs that didn’t exist a few years ago. They got trained to either go to A Level and university or go work on the plantation. I mean, go work in tourism.

“Technology is moving so fast that we have to solve problems that we didn’t even know existed a few years ago. Tech information is doubling every year. The things you learn in first year university are outdated by the time you get to the third year.”

Wow, thought the children. Most of us will never go to university. As a matter of fact, most of us will be abandoned by the government after fifth form, unless we affix our lips to some political party’s posterior.

And then, for some reason, he started boasting about his health watch. It’s a sweet watch, in truth. It doesn’t jut tell time. He tells Jimmy how long he slept, how many hours of deep sleep he got, how many steps he took today, his heart rate blood pressure and when its time to poop.

In fact, pretty much the only thng this watch doesn’t do is tell Dr Fletcher that being in government has made him fat. And that gaining weight in government is a pretty good sign that he’s not working hard enough to help deliver the wonderful future of health watches and washing machines that you can control from space with your mobile phone.

I mean, after all, Fletcher’s government forced St Lucian children to buy PAPER TEXTBOOKS at such high cost that it would have been cheaper to get them all X-O laptops loaded with e:textbooks. If they had tried hard enough, none of them would be gaining weight. They would be gray and thin like Obama. Or Mandela. Even Putin is in good shape even though he spends most of the time running around Ukraine with a white sheet on his head and finding new and creative ways to remind Russian billionaires and punk bands that they are his personal property.

Jimmy Fletcher is a fat fake who says all the right things but has done nothing to make St Lucians feel like they are winning the race to make the future the present.

But why am I picking on Jimmy Fletcher?

Kenny is a fat fake too.

And Richard. And Allen. Fat, soft-bellied, rich men who only walk a mile when they are deliberately exercising with their hi-tech health watches on. The kind of men who can’t get anything right, but who get paid big time every time they do more wrong.